Monday, October 13, 2008


I'm not much of a football fan. I mean, it's alright, know, I just don't watch too much of the stuff. I'm just not into it.
Okay, okay, the sum total of my football-watching experience has been the few minutes of the game I've accidentally watched while trying to make it back to the living room from the kitchen in time to catch the cool TV ads on Super Bowl Sunday.
This past Saturday, some of my dad's friends had extra tickets to the OSU Beavers vs. Wash. State Cougars game. So, Shawn and I decided to tag along for fun.

The first thing that really stuck out to me was the fact that about 99 percent of the people attending the game were wearing either orange or black or a combination of the 2 colors.

It was as if Halloween had just puked up a gigantic Reeses Peanut Butter Cup.

Yes, that's a chic in the middle wearing only a black bra, orange paint, and the letter "S" across her stomach...

Shawn and I accounted for the remaining 1 percent NOT wearing orange or black, along with all the Cougar fans wearing red think it was gray...

My smuggled contraband came in very handy...until Shawn made fun of me so severely that I had to stop reading and actually pretend like I was watching the game.

Then it was all: "DEFENSE!" "BLOCKING!" "RUSH!" "YARDS!" "FIRST DOWN!" "TOUCHDOWN!" and a whole bunch of other nonsense terms. Sometimes I got a glimpse of the heavily-padded, hard-helmeted figures running around on the field, back and forth, back and forth, in no apparent order - and some other guys running around throwing flags in the air and refs in their black and white stripes getting down and dirty.

But, for the most part, my view was really just this:

Here's my dad with his buddies. That's Bob Gill (OSU quarterback from long ago) on the far left and Howard Joham in the middle in the shades, and of course, dad.
But alas! It wasn't all for nothing. We managed to catch the most entertaining part of the whole 4 hours on camera:
Oh, yeah, by the way, the Beavers won. The score was 66 to 13. Ouch.


Greg and Andrea said...

Mars, I laughed out loud pretty much the entire reading of the post, and then the baton man put me over the edge.

Eric 'n Leah said...

Okay, ditto!!! I was laughing so hard over the pucking up peanut butter cups thing....AND THEN THEY GUY with the baton! Oh my goodness. That is too much. Thanks for the laugh!
;-) Leah

Lindsay said...

Ok, that really made me laugh. I tend to feel the same way about football. And the video at the end? Too funny!

Anonymous said...

I hope you attend numerous sporting events this year!

lori lls said...

Great post! I loved every bit of it - the view from where you sat, the contraband, the very accurate summation of football terminology and actions (all of which means about the same to me as to you).

Poor baton man. We all have rough days, I suppose. But if you're gonna wear a tight black suit with a white triangle on it, twirling and throwing a stick around in fancy patterns in front of thousands and thousands of people whose eyes are on you alone, I'd say you're asking for it.

I hope he didn't kick himself too much later, because, dude, in the grand scheme of things, all he really did was miss catching a stick a few front of thousands and thousands of people.

Wilson Family said...

Heehee! I think Aidan and Charlie should take up baton twirling! =) Its safer than football, right?? =)

Elaine said...

This entry is so hilarious. I would have totally snuck in a magazine too! Glad you had a good time.

Amy said...

Oh my gosh Mars...HILARIOUS! I come from a Ducks family myself, and in the four years that my little bro was a "hottie tosser" for them and the 7 years following that (some of which my fam has had season tickets)...I can say that I haven't been to a game yet! I really want to be that know bust out my "going out bra" and paint myself up! But, alas, I sit at home and knit instead :) If I were promised a mediocre baton twirler...I may consider it though!

Oh, and it was great to see you today too!

Christi said...

I am cracking up laughing right now, Marlene! That was so funny...the whole thing. This might be kinda mean, but that was awesome how the painted OSU fans made the last guy's arm without a hand the exclamation point. That book you had did look pretty good...I would probably be reading too :)